this is all very negative no need 2 read

reasons why i am fucking awful and should die

• i am fat
• my face is weird
• my voice is annoying
• i’m not talented
• i’m not funny
• not entertaining
• EXTREME MAJOR DOUCHELORD OF THE UNIVERSE
• seriously im an asshole
• not interested in cool things
• way too high standards
• never have feelings for anyone who has them for me
• never
• everybody whos liked me has either been a) a boy b) too ugly for me or c) not into the same stuff as me
• i alternate between thinking im hot shit and thinking im stupid and trash at least three times a minute
• its really hard for me to be happy at things
• i’m kind of a failure at life
• i wanna be a slut but im too scared
• not outgoing
• not interesting
• thunder thighs
• not tall or athletic enough to be chunky
• short people are supposed to be thin and delicate
• too sensitive
• cry over everything
• cant stop talking about stupid shit
• treat everyone like crap without realizing it
• suicidal like all the time
• GET WAY TOO ATTACHED TO ANYONE WHO GIVES ME ANY TINY BIT OF ATTENTION BECAUSE IM NOT USED TO PEOPLE CARING ABOUT ME!!
• not sexy at all
• small weird boobs
• acne everywhere
• into all the wrong things
• cant fucking say the right things when im talking to people
• i have fucking bipolar and debilitating anxiety that makes it nearly impossible for me to do anything without regretting it and feeling like a complete asshole or bitch or just a fucking idiot
• not the person i wanted to be
• there are no gay girls anywhere in the entire fucking city who arent my friends or my exes
• even if there were i probably wouldnt like them anyway because i never like people i can be with!!! fucking amazing!!
• shit at school
• talk nothing but mindless drivel that no one gives a fuck about
• i hardly have any friends
• the friends i do have go to a different school and i rarely see them
• i don’t know how to fucking comfort people when they’re sad
• i can’t just listen to people i always have to try and give advice and i know i need to fucking quit it!!
• overreact to everything!!
• i dont look good in any clothes because my body is so fucked up i wish i could tear it all apart
• i have raging hypersexuality that i cant control which wouldnt be a problem if there was anybody i actually wanted to fuck who actually wanted to fuck me
• commitment junkie!! but not anymore because im sick of life being a dick to me whenever things are going good w someone and im not going to risk that anymore!!
• would literally rather die than go back to school for junior year because i know that practically no one there actually enjoys my company!! BECAUSE IM AN ASSHOLE!
• I NEVER GET TAKEN SERIOUSLY!! FUCKING WONDERFUL
• i cant let go of things that happened four fucking years ago!
• BECAUSE I CANT GROW UP!
• i told myself i would never treat someone like that again and act that irrationally again but guess what i fuckin did!! I AM A FUCKING FAILURE
• i failed my 13 year old self im sorry im sorry i couldnt keep that promise
• i was supposed to be talented and funny and charming but i am none of those!!
• i would rather die than go through someone else’s death i want to die so i dont have to experience that kind of pain
• i fucking hate everything about me and i have since i was 12
• ive let so many people down its disgusting
• i have hurt people and im disgusting

basically i fucking suck please shoot me